M & M's on Friday!

Friday M & M's are the best of the whole week!

I love taking pictures, I just usually forget! It is terrible but many of my children's birthdays are picture-less! TERRIBLE, I know!!! But when I look through pictures for special occasion albums, or to make copies of for my grown children I look back and most of the pictures are from those events like birthday parties and Christmas, Easter... Very seldom are there just pictures of us, living life, enjoying the "normal days" together. When I realized that most of the pictures we have taken are from two or three times a year, I decided to start taking "normal day" pictures.

Which brings us to Friday's M & M's.
As we are making all of these Meaningful Moments, let's take some pictures of them!
Let us set down a couple of goals, and let's keep them simple.
First, take as many pictures today as you like, but keep them away from the embarrassing harassing type... "caught the 15 year old in curlers and will humiliate her for years"... (and don't let the 17 year old brother take those either :).
Second, choose 10 pictures to get developed either tonight or tomorrow. If you must, expand to 12 pictures. (Some may remember that 12 shots used to be a small roll of film!) Do not put it off! If you take the file or download to Walmart or SAMS, it will cost less than $2 to develop 10 pictures.
At the end of the year you will have 520 "normal day" pictures! And I believe they will be far more valuable than the 15th picture of candles being blown out!

Have fun with this! Make some memories that will last for years... TODAY!

Thursday M & M's

Let's start fresh with a review of daily M & M's (Meaningful Moments)

M & M’s in the Morning

Get yourself up on time
Wake them up to a pleasant sound
Have breakfast prepared
Read to them (short but sweet)
Help them get read head to toe
Make beds
Check Family calendar
Give them a drink of water
Bless them

M & M’s in the Evening

Eat together with candles (at least 3x’s a week)
Lay out clothes and supplies for tomorrow
Check family calendar
Straighten bedrooms
Read one chapter from a family book
Have family prayer time

For a more fully developed guide go to the blog titled
"M & M's (Making Meaningful Moments)"


On to Thursday's M & M Concentration:

My wonderful sister-in-law Kathi, is actually the author of this idea. She has "Media Free Thursday!" And I love it! In our family, we have done away with the media (i.e. movies, video games, television, computer, etc...) for periods of time, like a solid week, or even several months at a time. But I had never thought about just designating a single day each week to be free of the clutter of media noise, and the eye pollution, and general creative stifling gunk.

Now, please don't get me wrong here. We are very selective about our media every day, and we never have unwarranted media just flowing into the atmosphere. But even those who have limited amounts of media, it is a wonderful discipline to have a weekly hiatus from the distraction, no matter how limited it may already be.

I must admit that this particular Thursday may be especially difficult for my crew, because I am working on a lengthy project that has me away from home for most of the day. So the afternoon distraction for the two year old will be sorely missed. But we are going to try our best to accomplish the task of living without computer, television, or video entertainment for the entire day. (By the way, I am typing this particular blog on Wednesday night just to ensure that I do not need to get up early to write.)

So, here goes, Media Free Thursday!

Have fun reading, playing, block building, play doughing, neighborhood walking, flowerbed digging, mess creating, and generally family being, every moment you possibly can!

M & M's are WONDERFUL on Thursday!

M & M's on Wednesday

Wednesday: Mid-week Deep Cleaning

The weirdest thing about Wednesdays for me is that I always seem to get into big cleaning projects on Wednesday afternoon. It is as if it takes me the first two days of the week to get the house back under control from the weekend and finally on Wednesday I can start making new headway, "Going where no man has gone before..." into the nine year old's closet, or doing the big clothing season switch, or the inside of the refrigerator... whatever, I always seem to be up to my elbows when I look up and it is 5:30 p.m. and I have to finish up, get the kids fed, and everyone in the van for Wednesday night church!

I suppose my deep cleaning on Wednesdays gives me the idea that working on deep cleaning in my own heart and the heart of my kids may be a good thing to strive for on this day. So today, pay special attention to those corners within my own thoughts and attitudes and the closets of children's character. You know the messy areas where laziness, ungratefulness, unforgiveness, thoughtlessness, fit throwing, worry... those places they all live and grow and try to take over. Notice, and begin to clean out hidden cobwebs of disorder in our hearts.

So today, begin taking notice. And pray for the Lord to give you wisdom as to how each "closet" must be dealt with. Today, stop putting it off, or stop looking over it, and really face the character "flaws" for what they are becoming, or maybe already have become: rebellion.

M & M's are perfect on Wednesday!

M & M's on Tuesday!

Tuesdays aren't usually much easier than Monday.

So I suggest to make a fun food today... like Jello, or Smores over the kitchen burner or in the microwave... maybe those rice crispy marshmallow things... something fun AND EASY!

It won't do any good to have grandeous plans to make that fluffy desert that takes 15 steps and then never get it done, or actually make it this week and then never make anything fun again because you don't have time. Be realistic, and keep it cheap and easy.

Also, the kids love to help with this one. So put aside Betty Crocker and let Kermit in the kitchen to help!

Tuesday! Fun Food Day! What a great memory maker this one can be!

Have a great day, and love your family while you are at it!

M & M's Bite Size Portions

M & M's can seem very overwhelming when there is a whole pile of them. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing as enticing as a huge bowl of M&M's! No siree! As a matter of fact, M&M's are so wonderful because you can eat on them for several days, or even weeks, but to eat a huge bowl all at once is almost a waste because you can't get the most enjoyment out of them that way. Eating some and leaving some for tomorrow is definitely the way to go.

In the same way, even our Morning and Evening M & M's can seem like a huge bowl of M&M's. Way too much for one sitting. So, let's just take Bite Size Portions.

This week concentrate on one Morning and one Evening M & M.

Let's start with the first and the last.
First, get yourself up on time. Just concentrate on that one Morning
M & M this week.
And then for the Evening M & M, concentrate on having family prayer time.

And look forward to more M & M's for later!

Have a great day!

M & M's (Meaningful Moments) Start Monday

Monday is a great day to start on any new project. Mondays are almost like New Years Day on a much smaller scale. I'm being real here... have you ever started a diet on say... Thursday afternoon?



Monday is the perfect day to concentrate on what a blessing your children and family truly are. During your personal time in the morning go through each member of your household and think of how you appreciate them and their individual flare and the joy they have brought to your life.



Sometimes this may be difficult if a particular person is causing you tremendous stress, so go back further than the present circumstance and concentrate on a time when they blessed you, and how grateful you are for those times. And project those positive thoughts into your relationship today.



It is very important to allow ourselves to over flow with thanksgiving and gratefulness for the souls the Lord has given to share in the struggles and victories of life. By soaring with our thoughts to the heights of gratitude the mundane dirt and hassle of just going through the day suddenly takes on a new crisp glow, and a renewed purpose.



So Monday is Appreciation Day. Look around and see that the Lord is good, and that His love endures forever (in your home, in your life, in your family... forever.)

Remember keep it basic and start today!

M & M’s in the Morning

Get yourself up on time
Wake them up to a pleasant sound
Have breakfast prepared
Read to them (short but sweet)
Help them get read head to toe
Make beds
Check Family calendar
Give them a drink of water
Bless them

M & M’s in the Evening

Eat together with candles (at least 3x’s a week)
Lay out clothes and supplies for tomorrow
Check family calendar
Straighten bedrooms
Read one chapter from a family book
Have family prayer time

M & M's (Meaningful Moments) Start Today

This is a simple list and a great starting point for Making Meaningful Moments with our children, or "M & M's".

M & M's in the Morning

Get yourself up on time
Wake them up to a pleasant sound
Have breakfast prepared
Read to them (short but sweet)
Help them get ready from head to toe
Make beds
Check family calendar
Give them a drink of water
Bless them

M & M's in the Evening

Eat together with candles lit (at least 3x's a week)
Lay out clothes and supplies for tomorrow
Check family calendar
Strighten bedrooms
Read one chapter from a family book
Have family prayer time

M&M's (Making Meaningful Moments)

M&M's purpose:
To help parents take time, creatively and simply, throughout the day to make life meaningful with their children. I think most parents have a list tucked back in their hearts of things they hope they are doing or want to do with their kids before they are "out of the house." But life starts pushing in, with school, soccer practice, music lessons, and even church activities, and those hopes get washed away with the dishes. So my hope is to give you, and me, some simple ideas about how to make our moments meaningful, not just for today, but for eternity. And in a small way to help "turn the hearts of the fathers/mothers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers/mothers" as a very wise man named Malachi put it one time.

First, it is not too late to make moments meaningful for your children, infants, toddlers, Jr. High, even if they are "out of the house," our children always need our affectionate expressions. They need to know we are proud of them, that they are a one-of-a-kind wonder, and that we love them no matter what. That communication is always on time. Our children need affirmation just as much today as they did the moment they were born.
So start today, where you are in the course of your family life, and know that it is the right thing to do.

Morning Meaningful Moments:

Get yourself up on time
(...enough on time to fill your own tank, physically (have yourself ready for the day, completely dressed) emotionally (have your cup of coffee, the news downed) and spiritually (pray, read, take time to renew) before you have to minister to their needs. Try not to be rushing around getting your life together at the same time they are rushing around getting their life together. Be a minister not a slave to the morning hours.)

Wake them up to a pleasant sound
(...perhaps a song from your own voice, or other enjoyable music...this is a good time to play that classical music you have been told will make them smarter, maybe one of those sound makers with ocean waves and music...just make it meaningful)

Have breakfast ready by the time they come out to the kitchen.
(...even if this is a simple bowl of cereal or a pop-tart, something about having the bowl and spoon ready ministers to the heart.)

Read to them before their day starts
(Choose something that will boost their confidence, give them spiritual and emotional energy, and keep it fairly breif. This can be done as they are eating the breakfast you have prepared for them. Try not to get "preachy" with this, just read it and let it soak in. With littler ones they may like to answer a question about it, but don't press the older ones into heavy conversation. Just read and leave it there, on the tip of their thoughts.
If nothing else... you will be able to salve your conscious when you are asked, even rhetorically, "Have you read to your children lately." "Yes, every morning!")

Help with details of getting ready for the day all the way to their shoes
(Think of this opportunity as a time to minister to their needs, not teach them a valuable lesson on how to take care of themselves. Brush hair gently, tie shoes (even if they know how), help them look and feel their best, inside and out! 90% of this is actually accomplished the night before, see before bed meaningful moments.)

Make beds
(Make time in the morning to ensure that your bed and their beds are made, it will give them a feeling of being put together and the whole room seems almost clean when the bed is made.)

Check family Calendar
(Go over the days events with them so that you are not caught off guard about that extra baseball practice, and they are not caught off guard by the piano lessons at 4:00.)

Give them a drink of water
(Remember that the body needs water, not just juice and milk. Give them, and yourself a glass of water sometime during the morning routine before your head on into the day. I have even heard it can help with hyperactivity, and stress. Hydrate! It is good for the whole family.)

Pour a blessing over them
(Before school, on the way in the car, make the moments in the care relation building. Turn off the morning talk show and pay attention to blessing. If you are a home schooler attach it to another morning event or it won't happen, right after they brush their teeth, or just as they finish eating. This is probably the most valuable part of the morning routine. Bless their efforts, their relationships with friends and teachers, bless their work and their fun. They need your blessing, do not withhold it from them.)

M&M's are perfect in the morning!



Evening Meaningful Moments:

Eat together
(Plan on family meals. Plan meals for earlier than later in the evening. You can always push back the food that is ready for an hour, but you can't have it ready to eat instantly if you need to eat earlier than you thought. Crock pots are a wonderful invention that our grandmother's and great grandmother's used at a time that women first entered the work force. Buy one and use it! You can have dinner ready in the morning! Plan on meals, don't let them just happen. Oh yes, light candles...even over paper plates!)

Lay out the clothes and supplies for tomorrow
(This is the 90% I alluded to in the morning M&M's. This one step can save your sanity, your child's self esteem and possibly your marriage. I'm serious about that! Collect all backpacks, homework, school supplies, brief cases, keys, cellphones, have them ready and in a safe zone before sunset (or in the winter months, an hour before bedtime) Take time to do this just as the sun is setting, and when it rises you will be ready!)

Check the family calendar
(This will keep you from missing birthday parties and being late for soccer practice, and no suprises tomorrow morning)

Straighten bedrooms
(Ensure that every pathway is clean of debre'. Help (yes, it is okay to help them! Even teens sometimes need a helping hand. I am not advocating that it be done for them, but it is alright to do it with them.) kids gather laundry and straighen belongings so they stay free of the heavy load of the once a week or once a month "go clean your bedroom" syndrome.)

Read a chapter out of a family book
(Turn off the Wii, and sit down for 15 minutes for old fashioned family book reading. Use fun accents, and create a memory with your children. Take the time tonight, don't put it off. During the holidays read holiday books, during the summer maybe you can read two chapters instead of just one!)

Have Family Prayer Time
(This prayer time should be more meaningful than "Now I lay me down to sleep." Ask your children about the things they may be worried about, tests coming up, strained friendships, hopes for try-outs, and dreams for victory. Their concerns may seem so small on the platform of adult stress, but it is their only world, and their stresses are just as real to them as ours are to us. Teach them to pray. And give their faith a place to grow. This is also a good time to read scripture with them. Make it interesting, and keep it within the framework of their ages. When you first start this M&M, be careful not to over-extend this time in zealousness, you and the kids will burn out. Remember you are in this for the long haul, you don't have to read all of Genesis this week.)




Here is the quick list of Meaningful Moments for both morning and evening.


Morning M&M's

Get yourself up on time
Wake them up to a pleasant sound
Have breakfast prepared
Read to them
Help them get ready from head to toe
Make beds
Check family calendar
Give them a drink of water
Bless them

Evening M&M's

Eat together
Lay out clothes and supplies for tomorrow
Check family calendar
Straighten bedrooms
Read a chapter out of a family book
Have family prayer time


Start today! It is the beginning of all your child's tomorrows!

Making Moments Meaningful

Tuesday, family day for the Derbyshire's. Always a good day to catch up with what is going on in the kids' lives. Today did not disappoint.

I was able to spend time with five of my children one on one. Each had their own needs, and I am thrilled to report that I at least had the open door to meet them, and I hope that I did not squander the opportunities. It amazes me, however, that while I sound so wise to my own ears, how suddenly my children can inform me that "I know, I know..." which is code for "You don't know, you don't know..." So I tried with a great deal of will power to stop talking and start listening. That, I must admit, is not always a successful endevour, but at least I am learning to try. Perhaps when I am in my little wheel chair they will pat me on the hand and say that I was a good mother, and that they love me inspite of the times that I wasn't, and I will have learned how to connect with them as brothers and sisters in the Lord. In that way they will rise up and call me blessed.

As for today, I got to soak in some genuine hugs from my daughters and my sons, which is code for "Thanks for trying your best Mom." Which by the way, I wouldn't trade for any reward on earth!